Parenting Rules I find to be Crap

Do you ever wonder if your doing things right as a parent? Like, should your child be at a different milestone or should they be doing, or NOT doing, this or that by now? I think that often, but I do my very best to tell myself to cut the shit because my son is my son and nobody else's. He is an individual and I don't know about you, but I despise people that try and tell you how to parent and buy into all these timelines of when kids should stop this and start that.

Here are what I find to be somewhat myths to parenting and why you, if you worry like me, should say screw the "scientific research studies":


Breastfeeding:
I breastfed for 7 and a half months and I don't regret a single moment of it. I wholeheartedly believe in its benefits and support anyone who does it and I would certainly do it again. I don't think, however, that someone should be put down if they decide against it or can't do it for long. Maybe there is a medical reason or maybe they just can't produce enough. It happens! If you can breastfeed, I say do it as long as you can, but if you can't, don't totally beat yourself up over it. As long as your baby is thriving and healthy I mean ,come on, what else matters??
I also hate the breastfeeding myth that if you nurse too often, or nurse your baby to sleep, they will forever need you to fall asleep. No. Yes it was hard. and will be for most, to wean off of the breast but it can and will be done. It's a comfort and a special bond between a mom and her baby so shut up, critics, and simmer the hell down!


Ferber Method-Crying it Out:
Oh your baby will never learn to self soothe unless you let them cry for four F'ing hours to the point that snot is running down their face, they are banging their head against the crib, and terrified. Yeah, no. I'm sorry but the cry it out method is not for me. If my son is being a little jerk and throwing a tantrum over nothing, then that's one thing but when it comes to sleep I don't believe that it's all that beneficial.
Look, as a parent, you know that you are not neglecting your child when you lie them down at night but they don't know that. I am not saying not to let them cry for a while because chances are they will fall asleep, but if I have to go in and pick up my son to tell him it's ok, then I will. Sometimes rubbing their back, bringing them out to the couch while you finish a movie or to lying in bed with you is all the comfort they need to sleep soundly and other times they will do just fine in their crib. It just depends on the day for my son and if he needs me a little more one day then another, I don't find it all that big of a deal.

That leads me to....

Co-Sleeping:
I personally have been hyper aware of my sons' presence since day one. I wasn't too keen on bringing him into bed with us because I was nervous we would roll over on him, of course, but I found it to be quite the opposite. I knew every breath, every movement and every mid-sleep smile my son made and still do. Now just like crying it out, some experts say that co-sleeping won't allow your child to be able to fall asleep on their own. Yeah, they're probably right. Your kid will definitely still be sleeping with you when they are 17. Come on, people!! Yes, you should teach your child to sleep in their own crib/bed but if they don't, so what?!  You can always put them to bed alone after they fall asleep. Sure, Mom and Dad don't cuddle as much but hey.......

Naps:
Kids don't always nap and they change the times of those naps and stop trying so hard!!!! Napping is uber important but sometimes it just ain't gonna happen at noon everyday or when you want it to. Relax, leave at least one eyeball in the socket when you feel like gauging them out and try again in a
little bit.

Food:
My son is a very picky eater which is weird because my husband and I are not! No wait, it's not weird because, I'll say it again, my son is an individual. He wants certain things right now and unfortunately it isn't always the healthy stuff we want him to have. At this point, we give him what he will eat and make it as nutritious as we can. If he won't eat his chicken, we know he will have calcium rich yogurt, if he won't eat his Mac and cheese we know he will eat some protein packed peanut butter and jelly. Ok the jelly isn't perfect and not all kids are ready or able to have peanut butter ,but you catch my drift.


So all I am trying to say here is that every kid is different and they will learn at their own pace. I realized that I wasn't truly worried deep down about any of the above, I was worried because I thought it was I was supposed to do. I read countless articles about parenting and compared my son to their rules and guidelines and wondered if it was ok that we were doing certain things. Well I say
screw it. Whatever makes the parent and the child happy and comfortable in unison is probably the right thing to do.

I say, stop worrying because that's what others want you to do and waste your time worrying when you really need to. Easier said then done, but I plan to give it a whirl!

The Logan Chronicles: Up-Sleeping

On today's episode of TLC,  I share my thoughts on my child's new ability to fall asleep just about anywhere.  It's weird.

I think my kid is Narcoleptic.  I'm not 100% sure this is true,  but it has valuable supporting evidence. 

Last week I planned to go next door to visit my friend and had put my son to bed as normal.  I always check on him around,  oh, I'd say 765 times in a very short amount of time, but that night I didn't check him till right before I left the house.  When I crept up the stairs and into his room I could see the top of his head against the corner of the crib.  I found it to be very creepy at first and went further for a better look.

Yep,  there he was: sleeping sitting up against the crib.  Never in my most tired or drunken nights have I ever fallen asleep sitting up.  I suppose you could say I was impressed by this.

Since then,  he has fallen asleep sitting up a few times and it's very cute.  I also find it very odd and I'm like,  ummm is this OK?  I imagine it is,  but it's one of those first time Mom worries where you don't know what the hell is normal and what isn't. 

Either way,  I named these incidences,  " Up-Sleeping".  Don't get jealous of the originality,  now people,  I was born with this witty brain and I can't help it.

Anyway, today, the mother of all up-sleeps occurred.  I was doing my make up just in the next room where I can clearly see my son playing.  Seeing how we had to move all excess furniture ( i. e side tables and rocking chair)  to the other room due to him climbing it all,  there are little spaces of floor and wall on either end of the couch that he hangs out in. 

I heard him whine about something briefly and then it got real quiet.  That always scares me so I got up to  have a peep and found him up-sleeping ....against the wall.  He seriously looked like a drunk little old man that just couldn't make it home from the bar. 

So I think up-sleeping is better than no-sleeping,  right?  I am curious to see where he passes out next and what other new found  abilities we will see. 

 Maybe the ability to do the dishes and laundry?  Nah,  I ain't that lucky. 

The Logan Chronicles : Sleep is for Sissies

Today on The Logan Chronicles,  we discuss Logan's two-day strike against a nap before daycare.  If you have children,  you know or remember how much of a bitch it can be to get your little bugger to take a nap.  My son will literally do everything in his power to avoid giving into the sleep fairies even though most of the fight he puts up is when he's half asleep.

                   Exhibit  A: The Headstand

This move typically occurs when he is absolutely exhausted,  damn near passes out on my chest or crook of my arm (usually on the couch) ,  but then suddenly decides he has sick skills and jumps up to showcase his downward dog while moving his butt up and down.  Think of a drunk person trying to convince themselves they have it in them to dance to one more song or can totally still do a cartwheel or another shot. No...no you can't. Shhhhh, just go to sleep.  

Exhibit B: The Spin and Smile 

I work evenings in a hospital so the ole,  "sleep when the baby sleeps"  is something I attempt to do with my son whenever I'm able.  Once we settle down for a co-nap in Mom and Dad's  bed,  usually we are quick to enter dream land; in the above picture, however, Logan presented one of his other sleep avoidances known as the spin and smile. This pic was taken right after he spun around five times like a puppy, smushed his face into the pillow, and faked like he was sleeping for about 30 seconds. Then, like a jack in a box, he sprung up and smiled. Usually,  his eyes are shut when he does this one because he's so close to caving in to nigh nights.  I find this to be his odd way of trying to convince me he is way too cute to slumber.  Dude,  you are pretty friggin' cute,  but really???! 

There were other fillers in between Logan's antics that were not so cute.  He pulled his own hair,  threw his bottle,  and cried and screamed in protest. I,  too,  then pulled my own hair and cried.  Just take a friggin' nap!  

But then these two thoughts ran through my head: 1. I'd be pissed,  too,  if someone tried to make me nap, and 2. My son was having way more fun doing his headstands and his spin and smiles.  He simply wasn't feelin' a nap and even though there's reprocussions later in the day when he doesn't ( like he can get very grouchy. Duh. ) ,  my kid wanted to play with me instead. Being up and silly was making him happy and I only get a couple hours to play before we head to daycare and work. Not to mention very few years that he's going to even want to choose his Mom over other more exciting things. 

Wow,  did I just really conclude that at least I'm more fun than sleep?  Ehhh..... I don't know what to make of that.  Haha. Anywaaaayyy....    

So today I thank my son,  Logan Michael, for showing me that sometimes we need to say  screw the nap and bring on the toys.  We aren't promised tomorrow so let's have some fun today and sleep later:)  XOXO.